Sometimes, guys see women as mysterious creatures, a little bit intimidating but they actually aren’t. Undoubtedly, it is a fact that when it comes to meeting a woman (especially if you like her), the first obstacle that a man struggles to overcome is to know how to approach her. Apparently, the problem is that most guys don’t think about this until they are in front of the girl they want to interact with but they achieve nothing since they get choked. However, there are flawless tips you can put into practice. Let’s see what they are.
The Power of Hey
Approach her and words will come out. Start by saying hello, simple as that. Saying hello in a polite way is better than a compliment or a pick-up line this time. After this, introduce yourself. Be straightforward, and don’t show you’re nervous. You may use questions like: “Hi, my name is Louis, what’s yours?” (Or, “Hello, I’m Josh. What’s your name?”).
If you are in a club, you have more choices. You could invite the girl to a treat. For example: “Hello, my name is Alex. Would you like something to drink?” Another way to get her talking is to raise your glass to hers and say: “Cheers!” See this as one of the best options to pave the way for a possible conversation. Try this out, she will probably see you like an old friend the next time you see her. Some guys actually have learned to be bold enough to “cheers” to every woman in the club, since they state it’s like a good step to get things going in a place like this.
Ask her how her day has been
Asking how her day has been or what activities she’s been up to at school or work is a nice way to start a conversation. It also makes a good impression because she may feel you are truthfully interested in her and are very attentive. Questions like “How are you today?” hardly ever fails. Be sure to listen to her and don’t get distracted, remember it’s not a rhetorical question and girls always love to have listened.
In case of meeting late at night, after a supposedly hard day of work, you may turn to questions such as: “How was your day?” or “What were you up to today?” Avoid long answers if she asks you the same in return. This kind of questions is open and occasionally prompts girls to speak a little bit more which absolutely gives you the chance to show her you’re such a good listener.
Bring up something she may know
Talking about somebody or something you think she may know about is definitely another strategy to approach any girl. Just look around and focus on the place you are, there must be something unusual that’s discussion-worthy.
No matter where you are, there’s always somebody wearing eccentric clothing, or acting inappropriately. The key lies in using what is happening in your surroundings for the conversation, but make sure she has shown some reaction to it. For example, if you see a man wearing too baggy clothes, and you find him funny, you could come up with a tactful joke; something similar to: “I think that man over there looks perfect for you”. If you made her smile or laugh, you won!
Talk to her the proper way
Talk to her like somebody you’d like to date and not like a friend. In case you are interested in the girl, try to be less friendly, and talk to her like someone you’d like to date in the future. This is the part of not coming across as a boring guy. Also, if needed, read here a few dating tips for shy guys.
Don’t be afraid to let everything flow naturally, even if it gets a little flirty. Besides, there are tips you should consider in order to have a very good first contact, just like you were more than friends:
- Don’t let her take control of the whole conversation: it’s simple, let her speak enough but don’t let her interrupt or speak over you. If she talks a lot, be nice and wait for the right chance to speak.
- Don’t put her on a pedestal: remember she’s just the girl you may be interested in but not more than that. Start a conversation with her but don’t let feelings overtake you since it would be too soon for you to put somebody you just met on a pedestal. Take it easy.
- Don’t agree with her all the time: women like men always agree with them but it’s not something wise this time. Don’t do this as she may think you are a pushover.
- Don’t feel intimidated: try to relax; I know it’s a little bit complicated and many men fail to act normally and even experience sweaty palms, however, it is always important to stay positive. Intimidation occurs when bad or negative thoughts flood your mind and when you think everything will go wrong
Other phrases to use in a bar or restaurant
- The food in this place reminds me of: you can make use of this phrase when you meet the girl in a bar or in a restaurant. You might as well replace “food” for “drink”, or if you feel food there smells delicious, comment on it, or just ask her if she thinks the food smells amazing.
- Don’t forget this super popular question: “What’s your favourite food?” This is a very well-known question because it always works and you would probably be asked the same thing in return: “It’s pizza, and what about yours?” Try this out.
Don’t talk about yourself too much
Lots of guys believe that telling the girls every cool thing that’s great about them is the correct to make a good impression. In fact, this could lead to endless bragging which is a huge mistake as girls end up running away.
No matter how much money you make or how many cars you own, don’t bring up such things and be modest. This kind of attitude makes the girl think you are looking for a gold digger and she will pass you out.
It’s not easy to overcome the fright of starting a conversation with the girl you like but it’s necessary to make a good first impression. Don’t make too many gestures; avoid twitching your body and moving your hands too much as if you were having ants underneath your pants or too much energy.
Stay focused, waving your hands, for example, shows you are not comfortable with your body and lack of self-confidence.
Maintaining eye contact is essential; look her in the eye while having a conversation with her and even more if it is the first time you meet.
If you are shifty with your eyes, you may be conveying two messages: the first message is that you don’t care about her presence, or that she’s boring you to death. And the second one is that you are a guy who gets easily distracted. Both messages are equally terrible and generally leave a very bad first impression with a girl.